For some reason I was mentally reviewing all the Schools I've gone to, since it seemed like I was moved around a lot as a kid... I grew up in SF - 40th Ave but primarily Fillmore and a minute in WAY way outer Mission - but I swear if I haven't attended every school in the GD Bay Area I might have at one time at least tried to enroll... Montessori school out in the Sunset in SF, some unknown Kindergarten for a minute in RWC, Clifford Elementary in RWC for the rest of Kindergarten through 3rd, Sunnybrae for 4th & 5th, then to Borel and SMHS...

So fastforward a few derailed trains of thought - I don't know how this ended up in Google's hands... but get this shit. I just discovered Clifford Elementary School, is now Clifford School. We had some bitchin colors back in the day, Green and Gold, and I don't remember if it was a panther, a cougar, a jaguar, whatever the heck cat as a mascot but it was tough as shit. I think it was the cougars. I still have my busted ass Kelly Green crewneck sweatshirt from 3rd grade with the gold letters CLIFFORD and BAM! A Cougar head. See? Tough as shit.

But now? The new "Clifford School" mascot is a dolphin. A FRICKIN DOLPHIN. What the shit is that shit?! Everyone knows dolphins can't play sports, can't glue macaroni and yarn to construction paper, don't know how to run a GD bake sale, and CERTAINLY CANNOT PLAY FOUR-SQUARE. Just because every GD kid goes through that phase in 2nd grade of wanting to be a "Marine Biologist" (this lasts only until you discover sex and alcohol -or- how much work it takes to get through college) DOESN'T MEAN YOU STRIP THE COUGAR of its RIGHTFUL MASCOTNESS and hand it over to a frickin Marine mammal. Do you think you're gonna have Audoban Society bringin' endangered species, or flamenco dancers at your assemblies now? Starts with a N- ends with an -O. I bet your hot lunch tastes like shit now, too. What the shit do dolphins even eat?! Oh yeah? Well it SUCKS!

A dolphin. Seriously. I will never forgive you, Redwood City School District.